I don’t want to lose control
And actually do it
Seems like my thoughts have the edge
They’re controlling most of my movements
It must be demons
What I’m hearing is all the same
This reoccurring thought
That I won’t even feel this bullet to the brain
All it will take is a second
And I’ll be up there with the planes
But what about my family
The ones who keep me same
I made an oath a long time ago
That I’ll bring a change
And all these hardships I’ve been through
Wouldn’t go to waste
I will never give up on my dreams
Not even if me and death came face to face
I have more to do here
I’m not finished with this race
And for that power and confidence
There is only one that I give praise
I thank you God
Everything was headed south
I didn’t want to talk to anyone
I wanted to clock out
But I heard you call my name
You told me things weren’t going to be the same
And every since that day
I’ve been obsessed in my purpose
Just trying to understand
Is it me with the bigger plan
Seeing signs everywhere
That one day I’ll be the man
Staying humble always
Because nowadays
Life is just as short, as a nine to five
Reminding myself daily
To keep the upmost faith
I know I came here for a reason
I’m on a search for Grace
And I will keep knocking
Until there’s no door in the way
-Durrell Porter
